SO YOU GOT JOKES?
A deep belly laugh, the silent laugh, the laughter-to-tears laugh, the chuckle, the snort laugh: some of the best moments of life are accompanied by one of these laughs. They are precious, and often we thank the person responsible with a common phrase, "Thanks, I needed that!"
As we all know, a good laugh can be therapeutic. So on this International Joke Day, we have a strong prescription that should be taken immediately.
HOW ABOUT SOME THERAPY?
We gathered some hard-hitting, quick-witted, belly laugh jokes for you today, and in no particular order, here they are:
Q: How do you catch a squirrel?
A: Climb up a tree and act like a nut!
-A lawyer was just waking up from anesthesia after surgery, and his wife was sitting by his side. His eyes fluttered open and he said, "You're beautiful!" and then he fell asleep again. His wife had never heard him say that so she stayed by his side. A couple of minutes later, his eyes fluttered open and he said, "You're cute!" Well, the wife was dissapointed because instead of "beautiful," it was "cute." She asked, "What happened to 'beautiful'?" His reply was "The drugs are wearing off!"
-At the rate law schools are turning them out, by 2050 there will be more lawyers than humans.
-A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken takes out a cigarette and begins to smoke. The egg, pissed off, takes one look at the chicken, rolls over and pulls the blanket over him and says, "I guess we answered that question!"
-There's a senior citizen driving on the highway. His wife calls him on his cell phone and in a worried voice says, ''Herman, be careful! I just heard on the radio that there was a madman driving the wrong way on Route 280!'' Herman says, ''I know, but there isn't just one, there are hundreds!''
Q: How are men like coffee?
A: The best ones are rich, hot, and can keep you up all night!
Q: Why did Beethoven kill his chicken?
A: It kept saying ''Bach, Bach, Bach...''
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